Success in executive leadership isn't just about individual performance or managing your team effectively. There's a critical element that often gets overlooked: the strength of your peer relationships at the leadership level.
Let me break this down with a story from my years as a technology executive.
When I stepped into a new CIO role at a rapidly growing healthcare company, I made what turned out to be the best decision of my career: I spent my first 30 days focused solely on building relationships with my peer executives. Not diving into technology strategies. Not restructuring teams. Just connecting with peers.
The result? When tough decisions needed to be made about resource allocation and strategic priorities, I had allies who understood and supported my vision. This made all the difference in driving successful organizational change.
Let's dive into why peer relationships matter and how to build them effectively.
Why Most Leaders Get This Wrong
Many executives fall into a common trap: they focus intensely on vertical relationships (their team and their boss) while neglecting horizontal relationships with their peers. This creates several problems:
- Siloed decision-making that slows progress
- Competitive rather than collaborative department dynamics
- Misaligned priorities that waste resources
- A fragmented leadership team that breeds distrust down the ranks
When peer relationships at the top are weak, it creates a domino effect. The CEO starts micromanaging, teams become defensive, and innovation stalls. Eventually, this leads to what I call the "burnout cascade" - where frustration at the leadership level trickles down to create widespread organizational exhaustion.
The Real Impact of Strong Peer Relationships
Strong peer relationships at the executive level create what I call a "unified front of excellence." This manifests in several ways:
- Faster decision-making because trust already exists
- More innovative solutions through cross-functional collaboration
- Better talent retention as teams see leadership alignment
- Increased organizational resilience during challenges
- More effective resource allocation across departments
Three Powerful Techniques for Building Peer Relationships
Here are three approaches I've seen work consistently across different organizations and industries:
1. The Weekly Connection Ritual
Schedule 30-minute, no-agenda check-ins with each peer executive every week. These aren't status updates - they're relationship-building conversations. Ask about their challenges, share your own vulnerabilities, and look for ways to help them succeed.
The key is consistency. These meetings should be sacred time, even when things get busy.
2. The Shared Success Strategy
Actively look for opportunities to create joint wins with your peers. Instead of focusing solely on your department's goals, identify projects that could benefit multiple areas. Then, ensure both teams get credit for the success.
This builds a pattern of collaboration that becomes self-reinforcing.
3. The Public Praise Protocol
Make it a habit to publicly recognize your peers' contributions, especially when they're not in the room. This builds trust and creates what I call "reputation reciprocity" - when your peers naturally start doing the same for you.
This isn't about false praise. It's about genuinely acknowledging good work and building a culture of mutual respect.
The Bottom Line
The strength of your peer relationships often determines the ceiling of your executive success. When peer executives work well together, they create an environment where innovation thrives, talent stays, and significant results become possible.
As one CEO I worked with often said, "Show me a high-performing company, and I'll show you a leadership team that genuinely enjoys working together."
Take the first step today. Look at your calendar for next week. How many meaningful interactions do you have scheduled with your peers? If the answer is "not many," it's time to make some changes.
Until next Sunday!
